Jenny, is nothing short of entertaining. Watch any one of her Instagram Stories and you’ll immediately get a sense for how fun and authentic the actress turned two-time NY Times Best Selling comedic author, wife of Jason Biggs, and all around rad person, really is. And, if you don’t have time for all of that (because you’re busy, we get it) let me just explain; After meeting Jenny at a dinner party a few years ago—then subsequently stalking her via SMS text message until she gave in and agreed to be my friend—she sent me her book Live Fast Die Hot, of which I read in two days literally laughing out loud and forever sealing our friendship fate.
Therefore, when this mama of one (soon to be two) was down to let me come over to snoop around, er shoot/interview her, I jumped! After negotiating our schedules, we landed on a Sunday afternoon, days before she was moving apartments—a fate wished on no one, much less mid pregnancy. Thus, not surprising when she off-handily mentioned that if her pregnancy were to be a song it would be Welcome To The Jungle—mostly for the purpose of a metaphor and a laugh but also because that’s exactly what it’s been. @jennyandteets2
HATCH/How are you feeling?
Well, I have a cold and an eye twitch plus we’re in the middle of a move, so you tell me. I think my body has just about had it with this pregnancy!
HATCH/Current state of mind?
In my mind I want a giant joint, but that’s only in my mind because if I actually did that I’d be so paranoid, likely have a panic attack and die—it would be a terrible. Needless to say, I’m not entertaining that craving. Other than that I’ve indulged in everything else including raw fish, oysters and soft cheeses. Seeing as there’s literally nothing I’ve avoided, it makes sense that the the only thing I want is illegal. I did this with Sid (my first son) too. You know, in LA they almost encourage you to eat this way, it’s weird. It’s only back east that I feel people look at me strange at a restaurant when I’m like, “I’ll have a dozen sashimi”.
HATCH/First vice you’re gonna hit up post the baby?
A stiff drink. I’m not a huge drinker but a spicy tequila or a mezcal situation would hit the spot.
HATCH/ Craziest thing to happen to you during this pregnancy?
You won’t believe it but I was on set—the game show that Jason and I were filming called ‘My Partner Knows’ coming out on Lifetime later this year—and I got run over by a golf cart at 3am! Literally run over. Production was shut down and the cart was on top of my body. It was so gnarly! Everyone thought I was dead or at the very least had miscarried. My body went into shock, I was instantly cold, my teeth were chattering and I had no idea if my leg was broken—it was insane. Then the paramedics came and had to cut off my pants like in the movies! The dumbest part of the whole thing was that the driver was blindfolded as part of a challenge they were filming wherein the driver can’t see and the passenger directs him where to go—he drove straight into the host and onto me. Clearly, they didn’t win the challenge.
At the end of the day I was fine. I refused to go with the paramedics to the hospital, because I figured at that point whatever was going to happen was going to happen. I was only 16 weeks pregnant so it seemed like there wasn’t much they could do for me if something did go wrong. We just had to ride it out. I wasn’t scared about losing the baby because I didn’t really care if I did at that point (can I say that?). But in the end it all worked out, obviously (see belly).
HATCH/Funniest thing someone has asked you about being pregnant?
Lately men on the street have been congratulating me on my pregnancy. I find this so odd. I mean, congratulations for what? The baby isn’t even out yet! It’s also only men. Freaks me out.
HATCH/Sex while pregnant?
I mean, yes but no but yes. Truth is, sex before children is just easier. Therefore, this go around add a toddler into the mix that sleeps most nights in our bed and you take what you can get.
The silver lining is that having an orgasm while pregnant is so much easier because there’s 70% more blood in your body. So physically it’s great but having a toddler makes it nearly impossible, therefore they kind of cancel each other out.
HATCH/Does your man love your boobs?
Yes. He’s into pregnant ladies—think he’s always been. It’s a bit weird. Me however, I’m just thinking about the lift I’m going to get afterwards because currently my boobs are perched on my stomach and I have a feeling that once this belly goes they might just drop to the floor or fall off seeing as they’re solely being supported by my stomach.
We went to Hawaii but I was working the whole time—I had to finish writing my movie—so it wasn’t relaxing at all. OK, maybe a little relaxing because we didn’t have Sid with us and could sleep in but literally I worked all day. Jason on the other hand enjoyed the trip very much, his days included deep sea fishing and beachside tanning. I’m still waiting for a vacation that I can leave my computer at home and truly unplug.
HATCH/Number one wellness secret throughout pregnancy? I’m the worse at taking the vitamins—yeah, didn’t do well with that. But, I think walking has been key. I spent the end of my last pregnancy in LA and got crazy sciatica and was in a lot of physical pain and this time I’m astonished that I can still pick up my son. I think because I’m walking so much, haven’t completely turned into a human pillow. Being in NY makes this so easy. If I was in any other city I wouldn’t be clocking miles, whereas here it’s just part of the lifestyle.
I’m also rubbing a tub of Shea butter and Mother’s Special Blend from Whole Foods on my belly everyday. I have an unfounded fear that the old hole from my mid-90’s belly button piercing will stretch out to such a point that my stomach will splay right up the center, that and I’m terrified of getting stretch marks. Applying the oil everyday calms my neuroses.
HATCH/Natural childbirth or drugs?
Drugs. All the way.
Don’t have one. I get up, put sunscreen on and try to avoid more melasma. I can barely brush my hair these days. I’m past the point.
HATCH/Spin or yoga?
Nothing—I feel like tossing a 3.5 y/o around is enough weightlifting for me.
HATCH/Does being pregnant feel different the second time around—like “I got this”?
It went so much faster. I just haven’t had time to think about it really.
HATCH/Most overrated virtue in other people?
HATCH/What is your motto?
Live fast die hot.